I once thought setting boundaries was something I wasn’t allowed to do.

Boundaries Are A Choice

As a perfectionist and people pleaser, I felt it was my responsibility to always be available for those who needed me. Ironically, I was the first to tell others how much they needed to set boundaries, pour into themselves, and remember that “No” is a complete sentence. Yet here we are—those same people are still in the same place I am, stuck in a cycle of not following my advice. Clearly, neither of us is walking the talk.

I hate having my day interrupted by trivialities, yet I let it happen. I allow it because I’m a procrastinator who paradoxically despises procrastinating. I know. Vicious circle. I set boundaries, but then I let people cross them. Every single time, it’s a choice. I choose to pick up the phone when I don’t want to. I choose to scroll through endless feeds instead of focusing on what matters. I choose distraction.

Battling Success

Beneath these choices lies fear. Fear of letting people down. Fear of missing out. But mostly, fear of my own success.

Yes, I’m afraid of success. It sounds absurd, but hear me out. Success requires more than just reaching a goal—it requires showing up for the next one. It means taking what I’ve accomplished and building on it, which often feels like climbing an endless staircase. It demands consistency, focus, and resilience. My least favorite part? The constant push to meet expectations—both mine and everyone else’s. There’s always the possibility that someone will judge my choices as misplaced or my achievements as insufficient.

Then there’s the higher stakes. With every step up, the fall gets steeper. What if I lose my footing? What if I collaborate with the wrong people, make the wrong decision, or take the wrong leap? Success feels like stepping onto a tightrope without a net, with every misstep scrutinized.

Boundaries Are A Blueprint For Growth

But here’s the thing: boundaries exist for a reason. They’re not walls to hide behind; they’re tools to guide you. Boundaries protect your energy, your time, and your ability to move forward. Life won’t wait for you to figure everything out. While you’re overthinking, someone else is setting their limits, taking a leap of faith, and betting on themselves.

Your boundaries don’t limit you—they empower you. They give you the clarity to focus on what truly matters and the courage to say no to distractions. They remind the world—and yourself—of what you will and won’t tolerate. Boundaries are your blueprint for building the life you want, one intentional step at a time.